Saturday, November 3, 2012

Through the eyes of a child

I am usually a pretty private person.  There are some things that I will only tell certain people for different reasons.  Any how, I don't always write things about Tiffanie because I think it makes some people uncomfortable because they don't know what to say.  But I wanted to share this little conversation I had with Clint.

Usually when we go to the cemetary to put flowers or something on Tiffanie's grave we make the kids stay in the car so that we can just hurry and do it.  It has been a while sinse we have been to the cemetary so we went up last Sunday afternoon. 

Clint was the only one awake so we let him get out.  As we were standing there looking at the headstone and him asking questions he comes and gives me a hug and says, "I'm sad that Tiffanie died are you sad?"  I told him I was then he said. "I wish she would have lived do you?"  I gave him a hug and told him sometimes but if she did live then I might not have him, Douglas and Tamra."  He asked why and Tyrone told him because she may have kept us too busy.

I have often thought about the what ifs.  If she would have lived I am not sure we would have had the others when we did.  As sad as it makes me feel at times because she did not live I am very greatful that I have Clint, Douglas and Tamra in my life and I would not go back and change anything.

I know that I will be able to raise Tiffanie and I will get to know her.  She is always in my thoughts and near by and there is a reaason that she only needed to stay on earth long enough to get a name and a blessing.  I love all of my children and am thanful for the things that I learn from them.

Having this conversation with Clint reminded me why I am thankful for the gospel of Jesus Christ and his plan.  He knows each one of us and he sees the bigger picture and knows what is best for us.  There is a reason for everything and we need to live our lives the best we can so that we can see our loved ones again.  What a sweet spirit Clint has and I am glad that I was able to have this conversation with him.

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first fishing trip

first fishing trip
feeding the ducks while fishing